I find it quite incredible to think that he has been out with us in the world for so long. I felt like I was pregnant for such a long time, so it just makes him seem so grown up now. It is also really wonderful to think that he was first created a year and a half ago! A year and a half spent completely absorbed, fascinated and besotted with our little miracle. It feels like forever, and when people talk about having always loved their babies, long before they were even conceived, I can completely relate to that. After all, we are born with all our eggs ready and waiting! I was born with my little Ollie ready and waiting inside me, and in a year and a half he has gone from that tiny egg to this beautiful, busy bustling baby who is pulling himself up, crawling, saying "mama", eating big boy food and is completely fascinated by the world around him.
I do often think about the little life that was lost just before Ollie. It makes me sad to think of that baby. But then it makes me so much more sad to think that had that pregnancy progressed it wouldn't have been Ollie. We would never have known him. Have kissed his beautiful face, have held him and heard him laugh. I was so terribly sad when I lost that tiny baby but am so hugely grateful that fate, or God, or whoever it is, decided that, actually, Ollie was the one we were waiting for.
38 weeks of waiting. 38 more of complete joy. And now we're on the other side, a lifetime ahead of us, and I can't wait!
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